As the rain fell, the hail beat the windows, and the thunder shook the frames, the loneliness set in. This longing is profound. I want to share my fears in an intimate space. I want to "find someone, to have my back and never do me wrong." I want to feel safe and secure when I'm in my man's presence, and especially when I am not.
Today, upon waking from a hibernation type sleep, I emerged pensive. I am considering the recent passing of a co-worker with whom I have been friendly. I am considering the men I have allowed into my space over the past five years. I am considering the times I silenced my intuition and went along for the ride. I have decided that it is time for a change.
No baby steps this time...it is time for my transformation.
Transformation requires the end of some relationships and redefinition of others -- at the foundation, my relationship with myself must be loving, accepting, and supportive. Transformation will be successfully achieved in a space of honesty and clarity -- the clutter (physical and psychic) must be purged. Transformation requires energy and strength -- insecurity, limitations and fear have no place.
I am ready for a real connection. I am ready to be vulnerable and honest. I am ready to give and receive a real love.
It's time to open up and let him find me...
transformation, opening up, letting go ... all such challenging things to do...
ReplyDeleteI am with you, though, these are the tasks that are most pressing ... for you and for me.
Not sure how to measure progress yet...